Part 2.
How to Get Real
Ok, you've discovered you're a poser--what
can you do about it?
Follow this guide to be a real hippy;
Sell
all your shit
Give
away all the cash--money isn't real!
Discover
the bounties of the scavenger lifestyle
Stop
watching tv. 
Instead,
find a sacred spot, sit down, space out.
organic
gardening
toss
out that deodorant! Those bras too.
Obtain
a couch gypsy
start
a land co-op
change
your name
shop
for comfy leg manacles for upcoming protests
Practice
the "Hippy Dash" (throw pot one way, dash other
way in futile attempt to elude police)
stop
paying for drugs and grow your own
start
assembling your geodesic dome
eat
a shitload of mushrooms for days
learn
reiki/energy field manipulation/shiatsu/yoga/tai-chi/swedish
massage/reflexogy/--anything to get your hands on the cute hippy
girls
choose
a handicraft (beadwork, pottery) to immediately start losing
money with.
